Alabama lawmaker makes no sense

I don’t mean to treat a woman’s decision to terminate her pregnancy as being something to joke about. What I have written is a satirical comment on the illogical statement (quoted below) entered into the record of recent proceedings in the Alabama State House, severely restricting access to abortion.

“(Under the new policy) anything that’s available today is still available up until that woman knows she’s pregnant,” said Alabama Republican lawmaker Clyde Chambliss, who argued that rape victims can still get abortions just so long as they don’t know they’re pregnant.

An Alabama woman consults her doctor:

“I need to have an abortion, but I mustn’t let on that I know I’m pregnant, otherwise they won’t let us do it. I don’t know why I’d request an abortion if I didn’t know I was pregnant, but the new law down here says I’m still entitled to one if I can claim ignorance of my condition.

“Maybe we could look at it as a kind of pregnancy test, except in this case the result of your probing inside me would confirm that I had been pregnant, unbeknownst to us, but, as a consequence of the procedure, I am, sadly, no longer so.

“We must play this as if we’re completely unsuspecting of me being pregnant, and then you’ll be allowed do whatever is done to terminate it, and, only later, inform me that we had destroyed a fetus neither of us knew had been inside me.

“It sounds crazy, but that’s Alabama law for you. They just want to keep us women barefoot and pregnant down here. Well, let me tell you, this here is 2019 and we ain’t going back to them days.”

Michael Doran


We pay the tariff, not other countries

A tariff is a border tax on the buyer not the seller like China or any other country. The buyer pays the tax.

In other words, America pays the tariff to buy the item and that tax is passed on to the American public when you buy anything made in another country. Remember, Mr. President, we are the buyer not the seller, and the buyer pays the tax.

Mark Warns

Eau Claire